The following scene takes place in a small farming town. Horrible Customer hasn't renewed maintenance in more than five years and is stuck on an old version. Horrible Customer also doesn't like to pay for support and questions charges every time.
Horrible Customer: Will our software run on Windows 10?
Me: Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe partially. It's not supported.
Horrible Customer: My workstations are dying and I can't buy Windows 7 anymore.
Me: Yes.
Horrible Customer: I just tried to install the client on a new Windows 10 computer but it won't install. What can I do?
Me: Shall we talk about getting current with the software?
Horrible Customer: No! It's too expensive and not worth it.
Me: Didn't you tell me that you want to switch to QB Enterprise? How's that going?
Horrible Customer: Yes, we're planning for it. It's just that I need my Sage product to work on new computers until we can make the switch.
Horrible Customer: (Proceeds to soliloquize all the reasons why changing software is best for them.)
Me: I completely agree with you.
Horrible Customer: (Offers actual examples of how QB will serve them better.)
Me: I don't disagree with you.
Horrible Customer: (Continues to yammer on in this vein.)
Me; inside voice: For the love of God, go already!
Horrible Customer: We can't find anyone who knows how to operate Sage. People who know QB are a dime a dozen. By the way, can you find someone for us?
Me: No.
Horrible Customer: I can't get our version of Crystal to install on Windows 10. Can you give me the most current Crystal version?
Me: No, that's illegal. You can purchase it on the web. I think it's $495.
Horrible Customer: That's too expensive!
End scene.